Coach Ellyn

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#107 - AIRPLANE MENTALITY & Why You MUST Put Your Oxygen Mask On FIRST

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Summary

These last 10 days have been heavy, emotional, exhausting…and so damn necessary. And I don’t know about you, but I’ve been feeling it.

I’ve learned so much about what I need to do differently and do better. I have become aware and I’m committed to doing what I can.

And with all that, there’s been an endless stream of action items, things to do, content to consume, and so much more. Though I’m committed, I’ve had to get really real with myself about the fact that I just can’t do it all right now. I can’t…or I’ll burn out. And maybe you’re feeling that too.

So, in today’s episode, I’m getting back on track with a topic that’s near and dear to my heart: this notion of the airplane mentality and why it’s so damn necessary to take care of yourself. Because self-care isn’t selfish and I want to leave you today with some tangible questions, ahas, and actions steps for how you can put your oxygen mask on first so that you can continue showing up.

For show notes, head to coachellyn.com/podcast and, of course, if you have any questions or want to connect, head on over to @coachellyn on Instagram.

ACTION STEPS:

  • WHY?! This work calls for the most engaged version of you…and engagement requires energy! So, if you’re going to show up in this moment to learn what you need and want to learn, you need to have the energy to be present in the conversations you’re having. The half-asleep, burned-out, exhausted version of you isn’t going to suffice. Not this time.

  • Give yourself some space…Space might mean taking time away from social media, giving yourself time alone, or in nature. Brene’ Brown has talked about scheduling white space into her day. For her, it’s unscheduled time. She says:

    • “It takes courage to look at why we’re so crazy busy. Yes, there’s a lot to do, but it’s more than that. The hard answer - the courageous answer - that most of us stay really busy so the truth of our lives doesn’t catch up with us. We’re tired. We feel scared and uncertain. And we worry that slowing down will reveal white space that is unfamiliar to us, when, in fact, it’s from that very place that we get to ovwn the love and joy of our lives.”

    • Action step 1: What’s one thing you could do to give yourself more white space? What does your white space look like? Meditation, walks in nature, and social media blackouts…

    • Prioritize your self-care…This work for me lately has led to a mental tiredness that I haven’t felt in a long time and recovering from that has required a next level of physical self-care. It has required consciously cutting back on alcohol consumption. I’ll admit quarantine has led me to drinking more, but I’ve had to realize that alcohol isn’t serving me right now. It’s numbing and I don’t want to numb right now. Other types of self-care have been really prioritizing my work outs, my sleep, getting outside, drinking lots of water, eating more vegetables and less sugar, etc.

      • Action step 2: What’s one thing you could do to take better care of yourself? When are you going to do it?

      • Give yourself a release…This is underappreciated, but necessary. Because I don’t know about you, but all the things that were being stirred up, all the negativity, all the media that was just….intense! And I had points last week where I just felt like I REALLY needed to get a lot of shit out of my system. Hence, RELEASING! For me this is as much physical as it is emotional. In the thick of everything that was going on last Tuesday, I found that my typical barre workout was just not going to cut it. Honestly, I haven’t felt like going back to it since this day. I needed something more. Something that was more of a physical release. I ended up doing a boxing workout. In fact, the physical exertions of this past week have been much more strenous than anything I’ve done since rolling my ankle back in March. I’ve also found other forms of release to be really helpful. Physical release has included hiking, weight lifting, and basically anything that gets my heart rate up so high that I basically can’t think, like my 8 mile, 3000 ft elevation hike up Mount Si on Saturday. Other forms of physical release might be things like a good cry or - hell, I’ll go there - sex! Masturbation! Emotional release, to me, looks like music (playing the piano and singing) and journaling.

        • Action step 3: What’s one thing you could do to give yourself a physical release and emotional release?

        • Bottom line - I know that you’re probably feeling overwhelmed with all the things you “need’ to be doing right now. All the letters you need to write, books you need to write, documentaries you need to watch, and actions you need to take. It can feel overwhelming. But, I’ve been loving some of the content and messaging that I’ve seen lately about just this. Cuz this is a marathon not a sprint and it’s going to serve the cause and the movement better to be in it for the long haul than to burn yourself out in the first month. Plan for that. And take care of yourself so that you can be present, engaged, and still doing this work in 6 months, 2 years, 10 years, and beyond.

RESOURCES IN THIS EPISODE:

The TAKE BACK YOUR PRIORITIES/TIME Workshop Series - here

The Power of Vulnerability - Brene Brown

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