010 - Felon Love, Hung Like Eeyore, and Cruise Ship Love Bombing — One Listener's Wild Dating Files

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Buckle up, because this week’s episode is basically a dating fever dream—and it all came from ONE listener’s DMs. (Girl, you know who you are 👀)

Ellyn dives into a buffet of dating shenanigans courtesy of one brave soul who submitted everything from questionable Facebook ads to cruise ship heartbreak. Segments today include:

  • 🚩 Red Flag or Nah? — He ghosted her after the second date… then matched again a year later. Sir, do you not own a brain cell?

  • 💀 Dating App Fails — When your opening line backfires spectacularly and you don’t even realize you’ve dated her before.

  • 🤨 WTF Dating App Moment — “I’m like Eeyore. Clinically depressed…and hung like a donkey.” We have questions. And also, applause??

  • 📞 Too Picky Hotline — The cruise ship love story that had her falling in a week… and crying the next. Love bombing? AI-generated texts? Erectile dysfunction? It’s all here.

PLUS: Ellyn shares her own Notion-based dating dashboard and a few hard-earned lessons about second chances and why reconnecting with old matches is usually a trap.

You’re not too picky—you just have standards. And if those standards include working penises and not being love bombed on a boat, you’re in the right place.

Follow me on IG @youretoopicky and share your own stories: ⁠Submit anonymously here⁠.

Ellyn | Burnout Coach & Speaker

Helping overwhelmed high-achieving women in business to work less and live more. Since 2017, I’ve become a burnout and stress management specialist and expert helping clients to create more sustainable routines, more supportive systems, and the clarity and fulfillment they want in their lives so that they can finally heal from their hustle and take back their lives. As a former research scientist myself, I bring a healthy dose of evidence-based strategies to the notion of burnout. I’m a certified coach, have multiple stress certifications, am a certified Hell Yes podcast guest, and am a Senior Contributor for Brainz Magazine. Hiya!

https://coachellyn.com
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