010 - Felon Love, Hung Like Eeyore, and Cruise Ship Love Bombing — One Listener's Wild Dating Files
Buckle up, because this week’s episode is basically a dating fever dream—and it all came from ONE listener’s DMs. (Girl, you know who you are 👀)
Ellyn dives into a buffet of dating shenanigans courtesy of one brave soul who submitted everything from questionable Facebook ads to cruise ship heartbreak. Segments today include:
🚩 Red Flag or Nah? — He ghosted her after the second date… then matched again a year later. Sir, do you not own a brain cell?
💀 Dating App Fails — When your opening line backfires spectacularly and you don’t even realize you’ve dated her before.
🤨 WTF Dating App Moment — “I’m like Eeyore. Clinically depressed…and hung like a donkey.” We have questions. And also, applause??
📞 Too Picky Hotline — The cruise ship love story that had her falling in a week… and crying the next. Love bombing? AI-generated texts? Erectile dysfunction? It’s all here.
PLUS: Ellyn shares her own Notion-based dating dashboard and a few hard-earned lessons about second chances and why reconnecting with old matches is usually a trap.
You’re not too picky—you just have standards. And if those standards include working penises and not being love bombed on a boat, you’re in the right place.
Follow me on IG @youretoopicky and share your own stories: Submit anonymously here.