My top books for high-achieving career women
Dear High-Achiever...
You deal with a unique set of struggles, don’t you?
You're hardwired for achievement and you know it. It's not just a part of your career...it's a part of your very being. It’s a value. You're not one to settle. You want “more” in your life, and you know it’s not a phase or a guilt-trip about all you have to just be “grateful” for…it’s at the very core of who you are. And you also know that how things are going - how you’ve been living - just isn’t going cut it.
You’re sick of being on the hamster wheel. You’re sick of the burnout. You’re sick of the lack of fulfillment, freedom, and fun. And you’re looking for massive change.
But you also know you don’t want to be miserable forever and you don’t want to accept false promises anymore - from others or from yourself. You’re ready - beyond ready - and you just want someone to tell you want works.
Well, that’s exactly what these books can do…
Stress Less, Accomplish More by Emily Fletcher*** - I never imagined that my top book on a list for high-achievers would be a book on meditation, but it is! I honestly am newly obsessed with this book not only because I love meditation (seriously - read my mindfulness blog here), but because I love how thoroughly Fletcher understands achievers and puts the purpose of meditation for high-achievers into context. Her meditation technique, Ziva, is also the most transformation meditation I’ve ever done. It’s, to the this day, the only meditation I’ve ever done that led to a physiological response that was tangible. I’m obsessed and I highly recommend anyone interested in being the most high-performing, productive, and overall best version of themself check this book out!
Mindset by Carol Dweck*** - Mindset outlines the foundational work of Dr. Carol Dweck, a world renowned Psychologist from Stanford University. It it she introduces two opposing mindsets - the “growth” mindset and the “fixed” mindset - and how they affect our day to day lives, as learners, employees, and more. This book taught me so much about a core aspect of my mindset as a high-achiever. I’ve read and re-read it numerous times and the scenarios that Dweck outlines in this book could literally be directly pulled from my life, and I’m sure you’ll feel the same.
Self-Compassion by Kristin Neff*** - Who here knows how to shit talk their self? * Pauses while everyone raises their hand * Because we as high-achiever deal with such high expectations, with those expectations can come perfectionism and - from the perspective of self-esteem - perfectionism is a tough thing to career around. In this book, Dr. Kristin Neff outlines what self-compassion is, the 3 core components of it, and how you can use to overcome the emotionally debilitating abuse and shitty self-talk we can often put ourselves through. It’s been so important in my life and it’s become such an important topic that I’ve taught to a number of clients over the years.
How Women Rise by Sally Helgesen and Marshall Goldsmith**** - I loved the premise of this book even before I got far into it. It’s based on the teachings of Marshall Goldsmith, who wrote the book What Got You Here Won’t Get You There. That book outlines success principles and bad habits of people who sabotage their own success, but what Goldsmith found was that high-achieving women tend to suffer from very different sabotaging habits than do their male peers. So, he sought out to write this book in collaboration with a women who knew her stuff. I’ve found this to be incredibly eye-opening, absurdly applicable, and highly tangible to some of the biggest ways I sabotage myself.
Daring Greatly and Dare to Lead by Brene Brown**** - I don’t think I will ever write a book recommendations list that doesn’t include something by Brene Brown. On this list, you get two. Because Daring Greatly - one of my all-time favorite books - is a manual, a guidebook for how to do the scary thing. To, as Brown puts it, be the man in the arena and face the crowds of critics and - for lack of a better way to say it - tell them to “fuck off” if they’re not willing to climb into the arena with you. And if you’re a high-achiever pushing for more, for different, or doing anything unconventional in your own life, you need to read this.
On the contrary, Dare to Lead is Brene Brown’s foray into leadership principles and the importance of incorporating shame, vulnerability, brave work, and the hardest conversations into leadership. Because, as the synopsis says in it’s first line: “Leadership is not about titles, status, and wielding power…” and in this book she really paints a picture of all that really goes into leading bravely.
Steve Jobs by Water Isaacson - Kind of another book from the leadership, but I highly recommend this book for high-achievers because, for so many of us, our drive to achieve is to make an impact on this world, our industry, etc. Because who did that more so in their life - in the modern day at least - than Steve Jobs?!
The Upside it Stress by Kelly McGonigal - I’ll admit right now - this book isn’t the easiest read in the world. It’s dense and science-y, which if you’re like me might be just fine with you. But the reason why this book is in here because it had some really awesome ahas and insights into how we can reframe and re-think the stress we feel in our lives and why it might be there. I mean - shit - it’s called the upside of stress, and that’s exactly what she gets at. That not all stress is bad, and that we can reframe the stress we’re feeling to help us become more stress resilient.
Burnout: The Secret of Unlocking the Stress Cycle by Emily Nagoski - I first stumbled across Emily Nagoski’s work in her book Come As You Are, which is all about female sexuality. I highly recommend it here. But I’m including this book in this list because, well, I know how much as high-achievers struggle with burnout, self-inflicted or not. And I thought this books was fascinating, enlightening, and empowering when it comes to it’s insights into career burnout. What I loved about it, though, is that it really gets into the nitty-gritty of how burnout is different in women and provides simple, science-based ways to minimize stress and burnout. Highly recommend this!
Fear is my Homeboy by Judi Holler - This book might seem like an unconventional book to have on hear, but, let’s be honest! If you’re going to be a high-achiever, you’re going to have to get friendly with fear. Whether it’s fear of failure, fear of loss, or fear of success. And I love Judi Holler’s take on it, so I def recommend this one.
Do Less - Kate Northtrup - The title says it all - as high-achievers, sometimes we need to be better at doing less. At managing our energy cycles. Now, I’ll admit, I haven’t entirely bought into some of the notions of burnout, energy management, and “doing less” in this book, like timing projects and productivity based on your menstrual cycle, but it definitely got me thinking about being more strategic. And in that sense, I would definitely recommend this book!
You’re Not Lost - Maxie McCoy - This one is in here for a simple reason - if you’re a high-achiever who has felt that elusive, persistent call for “more”…the call that might seem like a guilt-trip telling you that you should be more “grateful” for what you have in your life, you might have felt this feeling. Feeling lost. Questioning yourself. Questioning the path you’re on. Wondering if it’s just you. Wondering if you’re the only one that feels lost. This book wonderfully tells you that you’re not. And I’m so grateful for that. Highly recommend this!
Your Oxygen Mask First - Kevin N. Lawrence.The title of this book is one of my favorite analogies to make when it comes to self-care. Especially for high-achievers. But what I grew to love even more about this book relates to it’s subtitle - 17 habits to help high-achievers survive and thrive in leadership and life. This book has leadership skills that - especially if you’re a burned out high-achiever in corporate America - need to know! I literally was reading it highlighting and bookmarking passages that exactly related to the situations of clients! It’s highly relatable and I definitely recommend it to those of you in corporate struggling with burnout.
Reboot - Jerry Colonna.I wasn’t far into this book when I decided that I needed to add it into this list. Colonna is known as the “CEO whisperer”, but I think there’s power in his philosophies for any high-achiever. He forces you to confront things through a process called radical self-inquiry that we could all due with confronting. Things like leadership skills, career insecurities, money mindset, and more. The kernels about why we work so hard and our motivations are powerful and I think for all high-achievers it will serve some powerful AHAs.
Essentialism - Greg McKeown. I ignored this book for a long long time because it’s name suggested to me that it was just another book about minimalism. About having fewer possessions and not being so consumer-driven. Not that there’s anything wrong with that. I just was not looking to read that kind of book. And then I read the description of McKeown’s new book Effortless and it referenced this book and it’s content and I realized i’d been entirely wrong. This book is eye opening and inspiring, not talking about being an essentialist in terms of your possessions but your pursuits. And it’s one I think we all need to read!
